Non-IT News Thread
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@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
Biting is for sure abuse. In my personal opinion, spanking is a tangible consequence of a childs actions before they are able to put themselves in another persons position. With that said, I don't know if I could actually hit my own child. I think that would probably hurt me more than it would hurt or teach them.
Especially not at seven or nine years old, kids that old are beyond the point where spanking is beneficial under any situation.
I can tell you, I have memories of being spanked and none of them ever made me feel like I had done something wrong or made me improve behaviour, they were indicators that an adult had lost control and were almost always used when they had no explanations for their anger and were just hitting to hit. Be careful with spankings because adults like to say that they deliver a lesson, but don't be so sure that the lesson the kids get is the one that the adult thinks that they are sending.
Agreed. My brother was the worst child in the world. I could never write enough about it. The more he was hit the worse he got. It never helped.
That's pretty common. I know in school my teachers would spank us when they got confused and didn't know what to teach.
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Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
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@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
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@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
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@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
I would probably leave the decision up to the child. You either stop texting now or you can keep texting but you lose your phone for a day. Then they have to weigh the pros and cons of the situation and make their choice.
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@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
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@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
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@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
yeah the previously described beating was definitely - caught you in the act violent response to anger...
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@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
LOL, then how is taking away some privilege any different?
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@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
LOL, then how is taking away some privilege any different?
Unless you randomly take away something totally different.
You threw the Playstation controller at the TV? No dinner for you!
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@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
LOL, then how is taking away some privilege any different?
If your child hits another kid are you going to hit your child? That's an eye for an eye. If they hit someone elses child and then you dont let them watch tv its just a consequence of their actions.
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@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
LOL, then how is taking away some privilege any different?
If your child hits another kid are you going to hit your child? That's an eye for an eye. If they hit someone elses child and then you dont let them watch tv its just a consequence of their actions.
What makes an eye for an eye bad, in that situation?
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Last night my daughter had a bad attitude about sharing on Goat Simulator. So she lost... Goat Simulator for the evening. Eye for an eye, I guess. Seemed like the best way to go rather than taking away her dinner.
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@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
LOL, then how is taking away some privilege any different?
If your child hits another kid are you going to hit your child? That's an eye for an eye. If they hit someone elses child and then you dont let them watch tv its just a consequence of their actions.
What makes an eye for an eye bad, in that situation?
I don't want to tell my child that what they did was wrong and then do the same thing to them.
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OK you're literally talking an eye for an eye... gotcha.
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@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
LOL, then how is taking away some privilege any different?
If your child hits another kid are you going to hit your child? That's an eye for an eye. If they hit someone elses child and then you dont let them watch tv its just a consequence of their actions.
What makes an eye for an eye bad, in that situation?
I don't want to tell my child that what they did was wrong and then do the same thing to them.
Interesting, but that rules out ANY punishment, right? All punishments are wrong if not punishments, right?
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@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
OK you're literally talking an eye for an eye... gotcha.
Goat for a goat, in my case.
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@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
LOL, then how is taking away some privilege any different?
If your child hits another kid are you going to hit your child? That's an eye for an eye. If they hit someone elses child and then you dont let them watch tv its just a consequence of their actions.
What makes an eye for an eye bad, in that situation?
I don't want to tell my child that what they did was wrong and then do the same thing to them.
I think one of the (we'll call them reasons) for hitting your kid after they hit someone else is to show them the pain that they inflicted, and how bad it can be.
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@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
LOL, then how is taking away some privilege any different?
If your child hits another kid are you going to hit your child? That's an eye for an eye. If they hit someone elses child and then you dont let them watch tv its just a consequence of their actions.
What makes an eye for an eye bad, in that situation?
I don't want to tell my child that what they did was wrong and then do the same thing to them.
I think one of the (we'll call them reasons) for hitting your kid after they hit someone else is to show them the pain that they inflicted, and how bad it can be.
Right, I would normally, when plausible, recommend being closer to an eye for an eye than a foot for an eye. Unrelated punishments seem more capricious and confusing.
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@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@wirestyle22 said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
@scottalanmiller said in Non-IT News Thread:
@Dashrender said in Non-IT News Thread:
Spanking is nothing but a risk reward payoff situation.
My parents both spanked the three of us. The last beating I received was at 16. I literally stood there while he hit me with a belt until he swung to low and hit my leg, causing enough pain to involuntarily take a half step forward, yelp, then I was standing up straight again.
It was clear in the end, that he was wiping me until he got some satisfaction, after I yelped, he stopped. I'm sure he realized that beatings/spankings/whatever were worthless at that point.
I'll agree with @scottalanmiller that this was a situation where his anger was out of control. Luckily spankings were a fairly rare thing in my house, I think I got 5 or 6 total while growing up, two of them were pretty savage, luckily neither was ever repeated, and both would be considered child abuse today.
Yup, once you spank, the kid is in power. It's a transfer of power from the adult to the child. It's resorting to physical means when mental isn't working.
I didn't really get spanked at home, but was spanked at school continuously by people that I now realize should be executed (I literally mean that.)
How isn't all punishment a transfer - if one is to agree with you.
It's all about the risk reward setup. Sure, as a very young child, a spanking MIGHT give a longer lasting impression to change behavior, but once you realize that's what the goal of a spanking is, then it's all the same - what's the difference between spanking versus taking the computer away - just risk reward.
To some degree that is true, but you rarely send a kid to a five minute time out or take away something that they have abused it's rarely a direct loss of control or violence. Violence is a different thing completely. Now if you are spanking a kid because he had inflicted violence on someone else and did so after a cooling down period so that the spanking is done as a planned punishment rather than a direct violent response to anger, sure.
I still wouldn't agree with that. I think that would more than likely teach an eye for an eye mentality to the child.
LOL, then how is taking away some privilege any different?
If your child hits another kid are you going to hit your child? That's an eye for an eye. If they hit someone elses child and then you dont let them watch tv its just a consequence of their actions.
What makes an eye for an eye bad, in that situation?
I don't want to tell my child that what they did was wrong and then do the same thing to them.
Interesting, but that rules out ANY punishment, right? All punishments are wrong if not punishments, right?
The common way of describing it is a punishment but to me it's a consequence. I would give them a choice between two outcomes like I stated above. That way if they want to continue doing what they are doing they can, but there will be a consequence.
The average child is cognitively incapable of putting themselves in anothers position until around the age of 7. What is hitting going to achieve?
